We are loving our children into uselessness. We are raising a generation that believes wealth is inherited, not earned; that comfort is a birthright, not a reward. From flying first class before their first job, to demanding six-figure salaries with zero skills — we are breeding entitlement, not excellence. This is not love. This is a slow, sweet poison. And if we don’t stop now, the future will be merciless to them.
I have lived in the Republic of Ireland, the United Kingdom, and now in Nigeria, and the difference in how children are raised is like night and day. When I was a student in the Republic of Ireland, one thing struck me immediately — every single Irish undergraduate I met, including the children of millionaires, worked during holidays or weekends to support themselves. It didn’t matter how wealthy their parents were — working was the norm.
Foreign students from other countries did the same. But Nigerians? Not us! Too many of our children grow up with a warped sense of entitlement, as if wealth and comfort are birthrights.
I once watched Sir Richard Branson — billionaire owner of Virgin Airlines — on the Biography Channel. He revealed that his young children travel in economy class, even when he and his wife fly upper class. Imagine that — a billionaire teaching his children humility! Meanwhile, here in Nigeria, it’s common to see teenagers flying business or first class for their very first trip abroad to study. In the Republic of Ireland and the UK, even the Prime Minister has no private jet; they fly Aer Lingus or British Airways. The Royal Family themselves live modestly in many ways — Kate Middleton, wife of Prince William, drives a simple VW Golf.
The difference? Over there, even billionaires work hard for their money. Here, too many people steal it — and then pass on that same culture of unearned privilege to their children. We know ourselves.
Last week, I was at the VIP lounge of Nnamdi Azikiwe International Airport when three teenagers walked in and sat across from me. I overheard one consoling his younger brother, saying their father might not be financially buoyant enough to pay for a private jet to take them to their hometown this time. The younger one was visibly upset, angry that they had to wait for a commercial flight, which he complained was unreliable. He even threatened not to travel home again if it meant flying commercial.
Can you imagine? A boy of less than twenty talking like that!
My journalistic instinct wouldn’t let me rest, so I approached the oldest among them, whose face looked familiar. I asked if he was the son of Senator Ali Ndume. He said no — that his father is a permanent secretary in one of the Federal Ministries in Abuja. I immediately kept my thoughts to myself. Soon after, an airport staff announced that their flight was ready for boarding.
This is where we are in Nigeria. Many politicians’ and civil servants’ children have turned major roads in Abuja into race tracks. Dare to drive out on Sunday evenings at your own risk.
If we truly want change in Nigeria, we must raise children who work hard, stand on their own feet, and are content without cutting corners. Right now, too many Nigerian children have never worked a single day in their lives, yet insist on flying first class and driving the latest luxury cars — fully paid for by their “loving” parents.
I often get calls from parents saying, “My son graduated two years ago and still can’t find a job. Please help him.” My first question is always, “Where is he? Why are you calling on his behalf?” The truth? That “big boy” is probably cruising around Abuja with a babe in his father’s SUV, spending pocket money that would make an average worker’s salary look like change.
Some of these “job seekers” come to my office — 26 years old, no skill to offer, but with a shiny CV prepared by daddy’s secretary. They arrive with a driver and are chauffeured to the interview. When I ask, “What salary are you expecting?” they boldly reply, “₦250,000 a month.” Why? “Well, my parents give me ₦200,000 pocket money, so I expect an employer to pay me more.” This is madness! And it’s why corruption will never die in Nigeria — because too many young people believe they deserve something for nothing.
From Oluyole, Ibadan, to Maiduguri, parents are unknowingly raising entitled, lazy adults. This “I don’t want my children to suffer like I did” mindset is destroying the future. You are not helping your children — you are crippling them. Even the children of some former Heads of State, sitting on stolen billions, are wrecks — hooked on drugs, collapsing in public, living under constant escort. No one wants to marry them.
Henry Ford once said, “Hard work does not kill.” But in Nigeria, we are getting everything wrong — including parenting. The future belongs to the rugged, the hardworking, and the smart. Will your children survive in that world?
It’s time to save our young ones from the consequences of too much love and too little discipline. Stop raising them to think life owes them comfort. Stop shielding them from reality. Because one day, when you’re no longer there to pamper them, life will be brutally real. And it will not care about your good intentions.
Mogaji Wole Arisekola writes from Ibadan.
